A soldier takes many years to prepare and get his mindset and physical state ready for war. And soon the day arrives when the sirens go and that soldier is called into the war zone…
Guns, rifles, machine guns, tanks. Bombs going off, bullets zipping by your ears. Death is knocking on your door, danger lurks around every corner…. You have to be on guard all the time. Sleep with one eye open is the norm.
But there comes a day when you have to return to normal life. What happens then? No bombs going off, no danger around every corner. Death is still there, but knocking right now. It’s not like you can just flip a switch and turn off your senses. They have been trained to be alert. But its not needed anymore.
I guess that is why soldiers end up with P.T.S.D. It is just a traumatic experience to transition from war to normal life. You simply cannot just let go of all that you have seen. The state you have to get your mind to in order to survive. And then suddenly you back with the normal people who in general probably have never even seen someone being killed.
We do this in life as well. We grow up in a bad environment, meaning actual area, issues in the family, bad people….the list goes on. And we develop defense mechanisms to help us cope with the rubbish happening either around us or to us. And it works, we come out the other side.
But now we are grown up and we are able to handle life now. The threat is gone….
But the walls are still up and we still react as if we in the war zone.
The walls that once saved you, are killing you now. You still at war, but the war is over. You still protecting yourself even though no one is trying to harm you.
Only you know if this is true in your life.
It comes across as strength when people see it, but its not true strength. Its a fascade.
It will take some work to get out there. Nothing that is truly valuable in life comes easy. And maybe you will have good people around you that are willing to take the beating it takes to help you remove those walls. Although you are the only one that can ultimately break it down.