Monthly Archives: June 2012

Hollow head syndrome and some reduction….revisited…

“If a wise book hits a hollow head….its no fault of the book”.

I am not sure of the origin of the saying, but I agree.
I wrote about this already, but I felt it needed to be revisited.

Most of us are what we could call reductionists. I mean that very loosely to what the actual term describes.
Since most of us think about ourselves most often than any other person (come on you can be honest here)
This means we often interpret things that happen and apply the things in a way that applies to our situation or life season.

Its what I call hollow head syndrome.

To explain, many things come our way in life, and most of them are bigger than what we are at that moment. We mostly never see it because we so focused on what we are going through and experiencing that we miss the full lesson. The result????

We tend to circle around an area until we “get it”.

Our approach in that way would be to reduce whats happening to how it affects us. Right? Few people go onto the bigger reality that is happening at the time. We tend to be hollow heads when we refuse to acknowledge that something coming our way means we can approach it in order to shape us and help us. Regardless of where we are in life at that time.

We can allow the “wise book” to knock us over to teach us. Rather than challenging the “book” which is clearly older than we are. (just in case you wondering I am not specifically referring to the bible here)
I want people to realise that most things that happen, they do not happen to you. They happen, and you decide how this affects you or you decide if it shapes you. And for arguments sake let’s say the “wise book’ is a situation that is new to you.

I hope you get what I am saying here. Sometimes we do not realise the thing that is happening at the time that we are going through it, we simply reduce it to what we understand at the moment.

People do this all over. With scripture, in life, at work, in relationships….
We never give over to the largeness of the possible outcome.

Meaning that we mostly never embrace the possibility that we can be wrong and change our actions. We normally defend our position (mostly to our detriment).

Maybe, just maybe if we approach it properly we may just get it sooner than later.
I will leave you with one of my favourite sayings…..
“Never argue with an idiot…they drag you down to their level and proceed to beat you with experience.”

the Honest One

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You will be disappointed……

At some point in life we all deal with disappointment. It is inevitable. You will, there is no escaping it. I was thinking about it the other day and trying to analyse it and see if there is a way to reduce or eliminate the negative side (because that is what I do all day….try to avoid all the pain in life ha ha ha).

Anyway getting back to my point. the best part about disappointment is what we almost never focus on. The fact that in order to be disappointed you actually have to have a hope for something better than what occurred.
I think we all hope for something better (the intrinsic you I mean). We know deep down that this is not all there is.

Look I am not saying we should live in a bubble and in fairy land…..but life as we know it now is not what it is meant to be. So for now I think that element of being disappointed is always going to be around.

I guess its how you manage it or deal with the people around you that will determine the outcome of it.

But here are a few pointers to minimize the after effects :

– Most people think of themselves and therefore you will not be high on their list of considerations. Therefore assume that as a given and you will not be too disappointed when they fail your expectation of them. And people will fail you

– That said, we get most disappointed when our expectation of the outcome we forecast (in our heads of course) does not line up with the reality. Solution, try not to forecast….. Seems so simple to say, but it is possible. I am not saying be a pessimist (although its so much fun being one since I am a pro at it). I am saying when it comes to expecting from people, live in the moment and be surprised by the outcome.

– Stop expecting people to be what you not…..and yes this deserves some introspection.

– People assume many things about many things and you, so why would you expect people to “know you” if most people don’t bother find out the truth anyway.

So all this is doable when dealing with humans, but what about God. He is perfect and does not suffer our failings, yet more people are disappointed in God (even the ones that don’t necessarily believe He exists). And we think we have it tough.

I will only venture one suggestion (IMHO). Most people don’t really know Him. So its almost impossible to not be disappointed when you have no idea what to expect (since you do not know Him). Also God’s P.R. officers (christians) have largely done a terrible job of representing Him.

Most of what is presented today is not true of Him, so disappointment in God is rife and rather unfairly so. Its normal for people to be disappointed, that’s okay, but at least let it be because you know the real person and work through it.

Enough said for today.

the Honest One

What’s NEXT….

A question that plagues me quite a bit.
Years ago (1993-1998) I used to DJ at parties. It seems fun from the outside and yes there was lots of parties, but it was not just party party party.
Though I do sound now (very different from DJing) the same issue plagues me.
And since I started blogging it follows me here too.

Its that question ‘What’s next?”

I am sure it plagues the creative arts people too. I am guessing that actors while doing a show are also wondering what they will do after the one they in at the moment.
While DJing while everyone enjoys the current song, I am thinking of the next song, In doing sound, while the audience experiences the show freshly, I am merely focusing on the next cue or what song is next.

Blogging is a bit different in that its voluntary, so if nothing comes to me I dont blog, but still in the back of my head comes those words….”What Next?”

I guess its like that in all areas to a certain extent. I know we are to live in the moment, but its not always so easy when certain things depend on you to “make it happen”. The way life is does not always lend itself for us to live in a moment only.

I do think there is a middle ground that exists between living in the now while not turning into a complete vegetable while “living in the now”. I hope i find it…..

What do you think?

Anyway, thanks for listening (reading) my little rant.

the Honest One

Position…Importance…Power

When people get high positions they are important………

Knowledge is power……..

Or at least that is conventional wisdom at the moment…right?

Let me start with Knowledge is power. Let’s use electricity to illustrate (corny hey). Anyway, lets say power exists in the wall socket(although we know that it comes from the company that produces it and sends it to our sockets). Anyway, the power in the socket. Now….does the power exist in the socket whether you know its there or not?

It still exists there, I hope you agree with me. Therefore knowledge of the power in the wall socket does suddenly make it appear. So power is power and not knowledge. Knowledge about that power simply allows you to harness the power for your specific task (hopefully for good and not evil) Wisdom would help you apply that knowledge to your specific situation.

Second thing I wanted to chat about today, is the means by which most of our world is run today. HIERARCHY and positional structures. This is simply my opinion on this (so no political stance is meant in this)

In a normal family we have a father, mother and children. They grow together and form relationships. Normally good ones and the children grow up into well adjusted individuals. And one would think that we would continue the approach out of the family environment. After all it works and its the natural process.

Yet we don’t follow that in life. No, we apply a different model completely in our companies and ruling organisations. We have removed the need for a relationship. We place people in positions and expect people to respect the position clinically. Presidents, C.E.O.’s, Pastors, Managers, Ministers, Leaders, Supervisors……and the list goes on. Sometimes we will hit the jackpot and strike a good relationship or connection with the respective authorities in our lives, but mostly its quite a painful way of life. It is the most foreign thing to have someone “appointed” as a father to you…..yet we apply these things so glibly in our “outer lives”.

Your position does not warrant importance in life…..relationships foster that. Also respect is given, it cannot be taken or forced.

“But how will we control the large amounts of people”…………Why should we need to control them. I know my thoughts are a bit out there, but if we were brought in a relationship rich lifestyle, we would not need to “be controlled”….

I guess I am simply wanting to know, if knowledge is power…..then why do we sit in a world like we are in now?????? There is not a lack of knowledge.

If our western world is so amazing and our leadership structures are so great, why are people afraid to step out there, why are they unwilling to co-operate with the “appointed” authorities all the time?
Why do we find people who will do “anything to get to the top” by brown nosing the “Boss”.

An environment that thrives on “appointing people” is one that seeks to control. It also leads to a lack of expressing the authentic self, since you have something to lose if you are found to be weak.
If life was built around genuine relationships, then it would be hard for “fake people” to exist……

the Honest One